Wednesday, May 25, 2011

In the Middle.

I'm in the middle of a lot of things over here.

I'm in the middle of changes.
20 weeks to 37 weeks
(my dad will probably be freaked out by this pic... he's absolutely certain that I am actually shrinking.)

Not just physical ones, but every kind you can imagine.
I'm going from 1 daughter to 2 daughters.
Pregnant to delivering.
Sure to unsure.
Unsure to sure.
And then sure to unsure again...
And I cry about everything.
I shouldn't say everything. I cry about unimportant things.
Like commercials.
And Disney movies.
And any little anything that makes no sense to cry about.
FYI: I am so not a crier... so I find this whole crying thing very ridiculous.
At least Parenthood is over for the season... that would've been bad.

And then there's this little girl:
tutus and boots
She likes to dress herself in tutus, furry boots, and winter vests to play soccer in the front yard.
In Summer.
And I love it.

I keep finding myself wondering about what she thinks of this whole thing.
She's going through changes, too, you know.
Only child to Big Sister.
Our baby to our first born.
How much does she understand?

I'm glad I don't know everything... that would be way too much to handle.
Willow Wall
As much as this new chapter amazes me, it's got to be pretty big for her too...
Right?

I can't wait to see her face when she meets her sister for the first time.
I wish I could record what my eyes see.
That would be cool.
Somebody should get on inventing that.

***

I'm in the middle of moments.
DSC_1038
She was mesmerized by this water...

I'm trying to sear every possible little detail I can into my brain lately.
I don't want to leave anything out.
I want to remember what it was like with her.
With just one.
My first little girl who had me all to herself for 2 1/2 years.
Willow black and white

I've had my camera attached to my side these last few days,
trying to capture every last snippet of time,
but even then,
I find myself just watching instead.
I just snap a few
here and there,
hoping the rest will stick with me...

sweet dreams, my love.

I think I like it better that way.


***

I'm in the middle of making memories:

DSC_1036

DSC_0916

DSC_0959

***

I'm in the middle of projects.
A gaZILLion projects.
But good ones.
Ones that I'm glad I'm in the middle of.
There's the Big Girl Room/Nursery, of course.
Almost done.
Really.
And then I will share.
I'm so proud of the patience I've showed by waiting until it's all done...
so you have to be patient, too.
Deal?
Ok then.
DSC_1059
Hint: these are for the above-mentioned room.

And then there's these beautiful fabrics that have already been
cut and semi-assembled into a
quilt like this one.
DSC_1060
It will be fabulous, don't you think?
I love making quilts for other people and seeing what they pick and choose to reflect themselves.
It's just as much fun as the actual making of the quilt...

And of course there's a couple custom nursery sets in the making...
for friends, family, and strangers alike!
The fabric shows up in the mail every day!
SO much fun I get to have over here.
The UPS man says things like,
"Just a small one today."
or
"Wow, this one's the biggest so far."

***
Changes.
Moments.
Memories.
Projects.

Basically,
I'm in the
middle
of Life.

And that's right where I think I'm supposed to be.




4 comments:

  1. YOU ARE SHRINKING!!!

    Love all the pics of your daughter!
    When I went from one daughter to two, I never thought about how that change would be. My first two days home from the hospital I'd break out in a sobbing cry as I was holding my newborn. Tears for my older daughter that I felt I now was neglecting in some way. I blame it on hormones, but it was one thing that I never thought about ahead of time. I wasn't prepared for those feelings. I felt really sad having to 'share' my attention between the 2 when the newborn obviously requires a bit more. It's hard, but somehow everyone adjusts and it all works out.
    Good luck and can't wait to see pics of the new little addition when she makes her appearance!

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  2. Love this post, Madi!!! You are beautiful, and so is your lovely daughter. Glad to call you family.
    Love, "Aunt" Jen (well, I AM actually your aunt-in-law, and Drew was in that awkward age of whether or not to refer to me as an aunt or not..) :-) Hugs and kisses..

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  3. You are such a lovely woman, mother and wife. You will adjust to whatever changes come your way - just as Willow will do the same. You've handled everything thus far with such grace and beauty. I can't wait to meet your new daughter this weekend!! xoxo Aunt Peggy

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  4. You just said everything I felt and couldn't put into words 12 years ago when I went from "my daughter to my first born". Wow what a perfect way to explain those emotions! Those feelings before you know what to expect or what it will be like when the new baby gets here, it will all subside you will feel like a family and the girls will be SISTERS, amazing, amazing gift!! This brought me to tears, thank you for writing it!

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